Well we've finally hit day 100! I haven't written a blog post for the last few days as not much has happened besides Keri becoming increasingly depressed and still needing stitches and being on ten minute obs.
Today Keri wasn't even up for ten minutes before she had cut open her wrist. She didn't tell the staff for a couple of hours and pretended she was fine for a while. She didn't get up until 2pm anyway. The staff and the doctor had words with her today while they were cleaning her wound and ordering a taxi so they could take her to the hospital.
"Oh my god, Keri," the doctor said. "You've gone very deep there. We're going to have to send you for stitches again. I'm going to have to go and speak to the consultant to see what we're going to do about this as this has become a daily occurrence. It can't go on like this. We were supposed to be sending you to the rehab unit but we can't do that with the amount you're having to be checked on and you can't even go out alone without staying safe. I'll let the staff deal with your wound while I talk to the consultant."
Keri never said a word through all this. One of the nurses cleaned Keri's cut and put a temporary dressing on it. It was the worst cut she's done in the last week and it's causing more and more concern. One to one observation is a last resort but they're considering that option more and more. Keri's getting visited by her mum and her partner tomorrow so hopefully that'll keep her occupied for a couple of hours instead of cutting herself, or Sally doing it.
Only a couple of minutes later and the doctor was back. The nurse had already given Keri some Lorazepam, along with all the meds she missed this morning.
"Right," the doctor said. "We've looked at your dose of Diazepam and you're on 7mg three times a day. We've decided that for the time being until this crisis period is over that we're putting your dose up by 9mg so you'll be getting 10mg three times a day. You've also got Lorazepam if the staff feel you need something extra. Obviously when things calm down we can start thinking about lowering your medication again but right now we won't think about that."
Keri went with staff to get her arm stitched up and has spent the rest of the day in a drug induced stupor. Even at the hospital it was obvious she was medicated heavily. Her favourite nurse came in while Keri was being stitched as he was working and was on a break.
"Hello Keri," he said. "It's been a long time since I've seen you."
"Yeah," Keri slurred. "Been sectioned at Callington."
"How long have you been there?"
"Since 8th August. Don't think you'll be getting that bar of aero chocolate."
"No I don't think so! How many drugs have you had Keri? You can hardly put together a sentence and you look like a zombie!"
"We've had to give her a lot of medication to keep her calm and try and stop her self harming this badly, haven't we Keri?" the escorting nurse said.
Keri just slowly nodded her head.
For those that don't know, the nurse had a bet with Keri that she'd stop self harming and recover eventually and if it happened Keri would have to buy him a big bar of mint aero chocolate! Not happening at the moment!
This evening she's been texting a bit and smoking a lot. She's settled down to watch Children in Need now. She makes sure she never misses it and donates £50 every year. It's the only charity she donates to and she stays up and watches all of it broadcast on the BBC. Hopefully this means no more self harm. I doubt she'll be able to watch all of it anyway. She's so drained from the amount of medication (plus she's got sleeping medication to take at 1am) that I doubt she'll be able to force her eyes to stay open!
I wanted to say thank you to everyone supporting us. It's been really difficult for all of us and you guys keep us going with your supportive comments and messages :) I hope we aren't letting you down!
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