Sorry it's taken so long to write today's blog post guys but Keri has had a really rough evening. She's been depressed all day and crying. She's suicidal and she wants to abscond. Earlier she posted on Facebook about stigma against mental illness and about ten minutes later was in tears again and tried climbing the fence (though thankfully the amount of medication she's had didn't give her much strength to go on, nor has her not eating) so that upset her even more. Sally is still unusually quiet. I was surprised she didn't come out to help Keri over the fence.
She's just had more medication so I'm hoping she'll calm down. I was hoping the messages that were put on Facebook for her would get through to her but she's in too deep to get a bit of hope out. When she was out a minute ago she was looking around her room for a way to kill herself without any risk of the staff finding out about it before it kills her (she doesn't want to end up like a vegetable). That's why she tried getting over the fence as she's obsessing over the suspension bridge again, although now she's focusing on jumping over the wall of the bridge instead of getting over the barrier on the middle of the bridge. It's a lower fall but it's still a few hundred feet!
I don't know how to cheer her up. I hate seeing her crying. I hate seeing her suicidal thoughts as if she manages to get out and do them then that means I die too, and so do the rest of us! I don't want to go out of this life that way. I'll give £100 to anyone who can make Keri smile! Strangely I think I'll be able to hold onto the money. If she holds out until her ward round them I'm really hoping the psychiatrist will do something about this! That's if she doesn't completely lose it tomorrow. Actually, today as it's now gone 12.30AM.
Thinking of you guys!
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